Monday, November 9, 2009

The Bigger Picture

Yesterday morning, I panicked because I had not written a blog entry for this week. When I first started this blog, I had so many things that I wanted to share with the world, but new topics weren't arriving as fast as I had been spending my philosophical coin.

There have been plenty of distractions here too: I've been out of work since the end of May; we have (as of this month) depleted our savings account and in fact are a few thousand dollars in short-term debt so that we could meet our financial obligations for the month; we accepted an offer on our apartment out of necessity (since we didn't know when we'd get the next offer...we had already been on the market for 18 months) that resulted in a 27% loss in two years; we're moving from NY to a location in NJ that is a few hours away; etc.

This isn't an excuse, but it is worth noting that the stress level that I have been exposed to on a constant basis has been quite high. And while I've been trying to keep my chin up, it's difficult and my frustration at the state of my life (especially my inability to provide for my family) has spilled out into my marriage.

I wanted to write this blog entry because, regardless of what's going on in your life, you cannot forget the bigger picture. Granted, this doesn't necessarily apply directly to those of you who aren't married, but I think you'll get the idea. The bigger picture is that there are always things to be thankful for in one's life, and even though it's tough to plod on day after day those positive aspects should be enough to give you the energy to continue.

Of course, this means you have to see and value what you have first. I had forgotten for a time that this woman living with me is my wife and the mother of our child; worse, I had forgotten why I married her in the first place. And it wasn't until we were fighting for a few days straight that I gave myself a time-out; put myself in the corner; and gave myself a few moments to think. Only then did I realize what had happened.

So I wrote her a love letter, and told her all of the things about her that I love. And it wasn't until then that the bigger picture came in focus once again.

The next time you're on yet another business trip because you travel 75% of the time; or you're working until all hours of the night; or you're upset because you were stuck in traffic and drove a total of 6 hours for a 2 hour meeting; etc. take a few moments to step back and admire what it is you have in your life already. You won't be sorry that you did, and neither will those that love you.

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